關於高一英語笑話閱讀

　　笑話一般比較短小,喜劇性很強,普遍存在於人們的日常生活中。笑話的娛樂作用可以減輕人的心理壓力,促進身體健康。小編分享關於高一英語笑話，希望可以幫助大家!

　　關於高一英語笑話：The Envelopes

　　The new manager walks into his office and, while settling into his new desk, finds 4 envelopes. On one he finds the words "open me first," and the other three are numbered 1 to 3.

　　He opens the first envelope and finds a letter from his predecessor saying: "These three envelopes will save you a world of trouble. In case of emergency, please open these envelopes in sequential order; envelope one first, envelope two second, and envelope three third."

　　The manager shrugs, puts the envelopes back, and forgets about them.

　　Six months later, the workers go on strike. The company closes, and is losing money fast.

　　After a long night negotiating with the union, he remembers the 3 envelopes. So he opens the first one and it says: "Blame me, your predecessor for every thing".

　　Wonderful idea he thinks, and indeed it works and the crisis comes to its end. His job is saved, and everybody's happy.

　　A few months later, another strike hits. He goes to the drawer and opens the second envelope. It reads, "Blame the government for everything".

　　It works like a charm, and he breathes a sigh of relief as his job is, once again, saved.

　　A month later the workers declare another strike. The manager goes to the third envelope and it reads, "Prepare 4 new envelopes".

　　關於高一英語笑話：What Is 2+2?

　　An engineer, a physicist, and a lawyer were being interviewed for a position as chief executive officer of a large corporation. The engineer was interviewed first, and was asked a long list of questions, ending with "How much is two plus two?" The engineer excused himself, and made a series of measurements and calculations before returning to the board room and announcing, "Four."

　　The physicist was next interviewed, and was asked the same questions. Again, the last question was, "How much is two plus two?" Before answering the last question, he excused himself, made for the library, and did a great deal of research. After a consultation with the United States Bureau of Standards and many calculations, he also announced, "Four."

　　The lawyer was interviewed last, and again the final question was, "How much is two plus two?" The lawyer drew all the shades in the room, looked outside to see if anyone was there, checked the telephone for listening devices, and then whispered, "How much do you want it to be?"

　　關於高一英語笑話：Good Work

　　Weary of constantly picking clothes up from the floor of her son's room, a mother finally laid down the law: each item of clothing she had to pick up would cost her son 25 cents.

　　By the end of the week, he owed her $1.50. She received the money promptly, along with a 50 cent tip and a note that read, "Thanks, Mom; keep up the good work!"

　　關於高一英語笑話：Cheap Wife

　　A guy comes home at 3 o'clock in the morning.

　　He has obviously had more than his share of booze.

　　His wife meets him at the front door, and the following conversation ensues:

　　"Where in the fuck have you been?"

　　"Hey, mama, I was just out having a good time!"

　　"Well, how much money did you spend?"

　　"Ninety dollars."

　　"WHAT!? Ninety Dollars! You asshole, do you know how long ninety dollars would last me?"

　　"Hmmmm well....ya don't drink...ya don't smoke...ya got yer own pussy .... probablyforever!"

　　關於高一英語笑話：Food Fight In A Store

　　In February 1994 in New Brighton, Minn., a 32-year-old man and his 24-year-old girlfriend were arrested after a food fight in a grocery store. After arguing loudly, the couple began throwing sweet potatoes at each other. Eventually, the man allegedly threw the woman into several vegetable racks, sending the contents spilling to the floor. As both continued tobrawl on the floor, she allegedly stuffed lettuce into the man's mouth.