關於假日好笑的英語短篇笑話

  每逢節假日,各景區景點爆滿,想要悠遊自在的欣賞一個地方的景色,幾乎是不可能的。下面是小編整理的,歡迎閱讀!

  篇一

  Alan worked in an office in the city. He worked very hard and really looked forward to his holidays.

  He usually went to the seaside, but one year he saw an ad in a newspaper "Enjoy country life. Spend a few weeks at Willow Farm. Good food, fresh air, horse riding, walking, fishing. Reasonable prices ."

  " This sounds like a good idea." he thought, " I' 11 spend a month at Willow Farm. I'll enjoy horse riding, walking and fishing. They'll make a change from sitting by the seaside.

  Four days later he returned home.

  "What' s wrong with Willow Farm ?" his friend asked him. " Didn't you enjoy country life ?"

  "Country life was fine," Alan said." But there was another problem.

  "Oh, what?"

  Well, the first day I was there a sheep died, and we had roast lamb for dinner.

  “Fresh meat is the best."I know, but on the second day a cow died, and we had roast beef for dinner. "

  "Lucky you!"

  "You don't understand," Alan said." On the third day a pig died and we had roast pork for dinner."

  " A different roast every day." Jack exclaimed.

  "Let me finish," Alan said." On the fourth day the farmer died and I didn't dare stay for dinner!"

  短期假日

  亞倫在一個城市的公司工作。他十分努力地工作,期望著休假。

  以前休假,他經常去海邊。但有一年,他看到報紙上有一則廣告:“領略鄉村生活。在唯利屋農場度假數週,可享受:美味佳餚、新鮮空氣、騎馬、散步、垂釣。價格合理。”

  “這到是個好主意,”他想,“我要在唯利屋過上一個月,去享受騎馬的樂趣,還要去散步、釣魚。這肯定與坐在海邊不同。”

  四天後,他回來了。

  “唯利屋發生什麼事了?”他的朋友問他,“你不喜歡那裡的鄉村生活嗎?”

  “鄉村生活是很好,”亞倫說,“但是有一個問題。”

  “什麼?”

  “第一天,一隻羊死了。我們的飯是烤羊肉。”

  “新鮮肉最好。”

  “我知道,但是第二天,一隻牛死了。於是我們吃的是烤牛肉。”

  “你真是幸運。”

  “你不知道,”亞倫說,“第三天,一頭豬死了。我們就吃烤豬肉。”

  “每天吃不同的燒烤。”

  “讓我說完,”亞倫說,“第四天,農場主死了。我不敢呆在那裡吃飯了。”

  篇二

  Sidd Finch

  虛擬棒球天才

  Sidd Finch1985: Sports Illustrated published a story about a new rookie pitcher who planned to play for the Mets. His name was Sidd Finch, and he could reportedly throw a baseball at 168 mph with pinpoint accuracy. This was 65 mph faster than the previous record. Surprisingly, Sidd Finch had never even played the game before. Instead, he had mastered the "art of the pitch" in a Tibetan monastery under the guidance of the "great poet-saint Lama Milaraspa." Mets fans celebrated their teams' amazing luck at having found such a gifted player, and Sports Illustrated was flooded with requests for more information. In reality this legendary player only existed in the imagination of the author of the article, George Plimpton。

  1985年愚人節,運動畫刊雜誌釋出一條假訊息,稱一個名為Sidd Finch的新人棒球投球手,能投出168mph時速的球,比當時記錄高出65mph;而且這位新人之前都沒有玩過棒球!他在一個西藏的寺廟裡學會了投球的藝術。大批棒球粉絲因此被騙。其實這個只是文章作者瞎編的。

  篇三

  The Swiss Spaghetti Harvest

  瑞士麵條樹

  spaghetti harvest1957: The respected BBC news show Panorama announced that thanks to a very mild winter and the virtual elimination of the dreaded spaghetti weevil, Swiss farmers were enjoying a bumper spaghetti crop. It accompanied this announcement with footage of Swiss peasants pulling strands of spaghetti down from trees. Huge numbers of viewers were taken in. Many called the BBC wanting to know how they could grow their own spaghetti tree. To this the BBC diplomatically replied, "place a sprig of spaghetti in a tin of tomato sauce and hope for the best."

  1957年愚人節BBC新聞中說,瑞士的麵條樹大豐收,農民都在樹上收割麵條。大量觀眾上當受騙,打電話來諮詢麵條樹的種植方法。BBC對此的回覆是:把一根麵條插在番茄醬裡,然後就等著吧。

  篇四

  The Taco Liberty Bell

  塔可自由鍾

  Taco Liberty Bell1996: The Taco Bell Corporation announced it had bought the Liberty Bell and was renaming it the Taco Liberty Bell. Hundreds of outraged citizens called the National Historic Park in Philadelphia where the bell was housed to express their anger. Their nerves were only calmed when Taco Bell revealed, a few hours later, that it was all a practical joke. The best line of the day came when White House press secretary Mike McCurry was asked about the sale. Thinking on his feet, he responded that the Lincoln Memorial had also been sold. It would now be known, he said, as the Ford Lincoln Mercury Memorial。

  1996年愚人節,塔可鐘快餐公司說他們買下了美國費城獨立廳的大鐘,並重命名為塔可自由鍾。憤怒的市民打電話給費城的國家歷史公園,要求確認這個訊息。幾小時後塔可鐘快餐公司承認這只是個玩笑。當天最烏龍的事件還不在此。白宮記者會祕書Mike McCurry被問到這件事時,隨機應變回答說,林肯紀念碑也被賣了,現在被命名為福特水星汽車紀念碑。

  篇五

  San Serriffe

  虛擬國家

  image1977: The British newspaper The Guardian published a special seven-page supplement devoted to San Serriffe, a small republic said to consist of several semi-colon-shaped islands located in the Indian Ocean. A series of articles affectionately described the geography and culture of this obscure nation. Its two main islands were named Upper Caisse and Lower Caisse. Its capital was Bodoni, and its leader was General Pica. The Guardian's phones rang all day as readers sought more information about the idyllic holiday spot. Only a few noticed that everything about the island was named after printer's terminology。

  1977年愚人節,英國衛報發行了長達7頁的增刊,全是介紹San Serriffe這個印度洋上的小島國的,據說那裡有好幾個分號形狀的小島。文章中大肆渲染了這裡的風情和民俗,介紹了它的城市和首都,甚至總統的名字。當天衛報編輯室的電話都被讀者打爆了,大家都想知道這樣美好的度假勝地在哪。只有少數人注意到,首都名字Bodoni是印刷術語,是一種印刷字型的名稱。