英文小笑話大全爆笑
在交際場合,能恰到好處地講個笑話或自創一個幽默,不僅可以體現自己的語言水平,還可以提升個人魅力。小編整理了爆笑英文小笑話，歡迎閱讀!
爆笑英文小笑話篇一
肉商與律師
A dog ran into a butcher and grabbed a roast off the counter.
有一隻狗，跑進一家肉店把一塊烤肉從臺子上搶走。
Fortunately,the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbor of his.
很幸運地，肉商辨認出’這隻狗是屬於他鄰居的。
The neighbor happened to be a lawyer.
這位鄰居碰巧又是一位律師。
Incensed at the theft,the butcher called up his neighter and said,
這起竊盜激怒了這位肉商。於是他就打電話給他的鄰居說：
"Hey,if your dog stole a rasat from my butcher shop,would you be liable for the coast of themeat?"
“喂，如果你的狗兒從我的肉店偷走了一塊烤肉，你會為這塊肉的損失費用負責任嗎?”
The lawyer replied,"Of course,how much was the roast?"
這名律師回答說：“當然會呀，這塊烤肉多少錢呢?”
"$8."Afew days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $8.
“八元。”幾天後，這位肉商收到一封郵件，裡面有一張八元的支票。
Attached to it was an invoice that read:
這張支票卻附上了一張發票，上面寫著：
Legal Consultation Service:$150.
“法律諮詢服務 ：一百五十元。”
爆笑英文小笑話篇二
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW,
有一位律師開啟他的 BMW 座車車門，
when suddenly a car came along and hit the door,ripping it off completely.
當時剛好有一輛車子突然駛來撞上車門，而且把它完全給扯了下來。
When the police arrived at the scene,the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage tohis precious BMW.
當警察到達現場的時候，這名律師正在對他的昂貴BMW座車所受到的損害，痛苦地抱怨不已。他滿腹牢騷的向警察嘀咕說：
"Officer,look what they've done to my BMW",he whined.
“警官，你瞧瞧他們對我的 BMW所幹的好事啦!”
"You lawyers are so materialistic,you make me sick!!!"retorted the officer,
這名警官卻回嘴說，“ 你們這些律師實在太唯物主義了，你真讓我覺得噁心!”
"You're so worried about your stuid BMW that you didn't even notice that your left arm wasripped off!!!"
“你竟然這麼擔心你一的笨BMW車子，卻沒注意到你的左手臂被扯斷了”
"Oh my God!" replied the lawyer,finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm oncewas,"Where's my Rolex?!"
這名律師最後注意到流著血的左肩膀，也就是他的手臂原先所在之處，他回答說：“哦，我的天哪!我的勞動士手錶在哪裡呀?”
爆笑英文小笑話篇三
A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by aman who asked advice on how to hanle his ulcer.
有一位醫生和一位律師出席一場雞尾酒會，當時有一名男子走近這位醫生詢問有關如何處理他的潰瘍的忠告。
The doctor mumbled some medical advice,then turned to the lawyer and asked,
這位醫生就咕嚕咕嚕說了一些醫療上的忠告，然後轉向這位律師。
"How do you handled the situation when you are asked for advice during a social function?"
並問他：“當你在社交宴會場合中被人詢間忠告的時候，你都怎麼處理這個情形呢?”
"Just send an account for such advice" replied the lawyer.
這位律師回答說： “就寄出一張聽取忠告的賬單呀”。
On the next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and issues the ulcer-stricken man a $50account.
下一天早上，這位醫生來到他的診療窒;開出一張五十元賬單給這名罹患潰瘍的男子。
That afternoon he received a $100 account from the lawyer.
而在那天下午他竟然就收到一張從律師那裡寄來的一百元賬單。