有關好笑的英語笑話精選

  冷笑話是近幾年出現的一個新詞,也是一種出現在我們身邊的不可忽視的新的語言現象,它具有強大的生命力,一時間大紅大紫,廣泛流行於網際網路、論壇、部落格、***、電視綜藝節目、喜劇電影、書籍、雜誌等媒體中。本文是有關好笑的英語笑話,希望對大家有幫助!

  有關好笑的英語笑話篇一

  The Time

  BLONDE: Excuse me, what time is it right now?

  WOMAN: It's 11:25 PM.

  BLONDE: ***confused look on face*** You know, it's the weirdest1 thing, I've asked that question thirty times today, and every time someone gives me a different answer.

  有關好笑的英語笑話篇二

  Boyfriend Upgrade

  Dear Tech Support,

  Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting modules, limiting access to flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

  In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0.

  Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and HouseCleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

  Desperate

  Dear Desperate,

  Keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

  Try to enter the command: "C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVEDME" and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications: Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0.

  But remember, over use can cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, HappyHour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.

  Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create "Snoring Loudly" wavefiles.

  DO NOT install MotherInLaw 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

  In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying additional software to improve performance.

  I personally recommend HotFood 3.0 and Lingerie 5.3

  Tech Support

  有關好笑的英語笑話篇三

  "I no longer looker look like an old lady," said Sophia to her husband now busy solving a cross-word puzzle by the fire.

  She had just been to her hairdresser and looked quite a different person.

  The fellow lifted his head and muttered under his breath: "That's quite true, darling. You don't look like an old lady at all."

  "And what do I look like?" insisted the lady blushing prettily.

  "You look like an old gentleman."

  “我看起來不再像個老太太了。”索菲亞對她正在火爐前玩填字遊戲的丈夫說。

  她剛去過美髮店,現在看起來完全像變了一個人。

  那個老傢伙抬起頭嘟囔著說:“一點兒不錯,親愛的。你看起來一點也不像個老婦人。”

  “那我看起來像什麼呢?”這位女士害羞地問道。

  “你看起來像個老紳士。”

  有關好笑的英語笑話篇四

  An ingenious idea 一個好辦法

  A man told the doctor that his wife had lost her voice and asked what he could do about it.

  The doctor said, "Try getting home late some night. It's good method."

  有個人對醫生說他的妻子不說話了,問他該怎麼辦。

  醫生說:“你試試哪天晚上很晚才回家吧。這是個好辦法。”

  有關好笑的英語笑話篇五

  No matter 沒關係

  A well-dressed woman got on a bus. She handed a ten-dollar note to the drive and said: "Sorry, I have no nickels."

  The driver took the note and said: "It doesn't matter, lady, You would soon get back 199 nickels."

  一個穿著很考究的女人上了 一部公共汽車。她拿出一張10美元的鈔票給司機,說:“對不起,我沒有硬幣。”

  司機接過鈔票時說:“沒關係,太太,你很快就會取回199個硬幣的。”