英語幽默冷笑話六篇

　　下面是小編整理的英語幽默冷笑話，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　英語幽默冷笑話：Not too Bad

　　Did you sell any of your paintings at the art show?

　　No, but I am encouraged, he replied. Somebody stole one.

　　不算太壞

　　你的畫在美術展上有賣出去嗎?

　　沒有，但我還是受到了鼓勵，他回答說，有人偷走了一幅。

　　英語幽默冷笑話：He Swore to Die

　　If you refuse to marry me, he swore, I shall die.

　　She refused him.

　　Sixty years later, he died.

　　他曾發誓要死

　　如果你不答應嫁給我，他發誓，我就要***。

　　六十年後，他死了。

　　英語幽默冷笑話：A Silly Father

　　Mr. White was watching TV when his eight-year-old son came into the room. He cried, Father, my grandpa just now slapped me in the face. Hearing that, Mr. White became very

　　angry. And then he suddenly boxed his own ears heavily and said, You beat my son and I dare to beat yours.

　　傻爸爸

　　懷特先生在房間裡看電視，他八歲的兒子走進來哭著說：爸爸，剛才爺爺打了我一耳光。懷特先生聽了非常生氣，突然，他重重地扇了自己一耳光，說：你打我兒子，我也敢打你兒子。

　　英語幽默冷笑話：Ask Your Own

　　It was a cold，raw day at Washington.Champ Clark was discussing the gamins of the cities with an English visitor.The latter expatiated on the wit of the London type of the genius.Clark declared that if the Englishman were to ask any Washington street urchin any question，the urchin would make anaptreply.They sallied forth.

　　What time is it，Bub?They tell me you can tell time by your nose，said the visitor to the first newsboy they met.

　　Ask your own，mister，mine ain't run nin’，was the reply.

　　問問你自己的吧

　　這是華盛頓的一個陰冷天。錢普·克拉克正和一個來訪的英國人討論城市的流浪兒，英國人詳細地敘述著倫敦式天才的機智。克拉克宣稱，要是對方向華盛頓街上任何一個兒童提任何問題，那孩子都會對答如流。他們便出發了。

　　什麼時候了，小兄弟?人們說你能用鼻子報時。

　　回答是：先生，問問你自己的吧，的不在走呢。

　　英語幽默冷笑話：我可以回家了

　　Now i can go home

　　One day after school the teacher said to his students，“Tomorrow morning，if any one of you can answer my first question.I'll permit him or her to go home earlier.” The next day，when the teacher came into the classroom，he found the blackboard daubed.He was very angry and asked，“Who did it?Please stand up! ” “It' s me，”said Bob，“Now，I can go home，Good-bye，Sir! ”

　　我 可 以 回 家 了

　　一天，放學以後，老師對他的學生們說：“明天上午，如果你們當中的任何一個同學能回答我的第一個問題，我就准許他或她最先回家。”第二天，老師走進教室時發現黑板已被亂塗，他非常生氣地問：“誰塗的? 請站起來。”鮑勃說：“先生，是我，現在我可以回家了，再見。”

　　英語幽默冷笑話：Cry

　　"Tom, what's the matter with your brother?" asked the mother in the kitchen. "He's crying."

　　"Oh, nothing, Mum," replied Tom. "I'm eating my cake. He is crying because I won't give him any."

　　"But has he finished his own cake?"

　　"Yes." said Tom. "And he also cried when I was helping him finish that."

　　“湯姆，你弟弟怎麼了?” 媽媽在廚房裡問。“他在哭。”

　　“沒事兒，媽媽，”湯姆答道。“我在吃我的蛋糕。他哭是因為我不給他吃。”

　　“他已經吃完自己的了麼?”

　　“是的。”“我幫他吃完時，他也哭了。”